In this post I give you my 10 signs that you lack self care, based on my own experiences and with examples of what I used to do.

I wanted to talk about this topic because it is such a vitally important subject.

So if you struggle with self-confidence and self love, if you wonder how on earth you could even love love yourself and are hyper critical about yourself then you may do some or all of the things I talk about here.

Self love affects the way we view ourselves, the decisions we make, the relationships we have and how we show ourselves to the world.

The first step towards change is self awareness.

So read on (or watch below to go even deeper) to learn about my 10 signs that you lack self care and how to cultivate the self awareness and mindfulness that you need to change it in yourself.

1) You hide your true self from others

You change your personality to fit where you are and who you are with

Always hiding certain parts of your personality that you don’t want others to see, maybe you would be perceived as too woo woo or spiritual, too this or that

Like a chameleon you change your behaviours to change yourself, you study others and copy them thinking that they are better than you

2) You over analyse

The habit of over analysing, picking apart everything that happens in our day

Over thinking all the things that were said to you or about you

Or even worse sometimes, over thinking and over analysing what you say to others to the point that it drives you mad

3) You have a strong fear of being judged

You worry about what others think of you

Constantly think about what others feel about your clothes, your hair, your make up etc

What you post on social media, what you say, what you do

You keep yourself small to stop yourself from being judged

You don’t feel acceptable as you are

Your feelings are usually highly irrational

4) You struggle with your physical and mental self care

You don’t treat yourself well

Skipping meals or over eating

Maybe you overindulge in other substances

Never taking time out for yourself, neglecting your own self care and your own self worth

5) You feel inferior to others

Insecurity is rife in your life

Always putting down or criticising you intelligence, your appearance, your personality – all of you

You are hyper aware of others and judge yourself against what you think others are like

But you never quite measure up to anyone, no matter what you do

6) You are too hard on yourself

Focussing on your failures and never seeing what you have actually achieved in your life

Appreciation for yourself is non existent

You never feel satisfied with what you already have so there is no gratitude evident in your life

7) You lack confidence

You dont say what you want

Keeping yourself quiet, keeping yourself small for fear of actually putting yourself out there to be criticised

Feeling it is best to not have an opinion at all, and never wanting to have to explain your point of view

8) You need excessive affirmations or attention

You need to know you are doing okay

Needing outside affirmations from others, others to tell you that you are okay, that you are loveable, that you are valid, that you deserve to feel better

Its emotionally taxing and oh so tiring to need so much from others but then to never take onboard when they told you what you wanted to hear

9) You have difficult relationships

They may be unstable relationships

You shut others out for fear of rejection

You feel inferior so you do everything for your partner and nothing for yourself so you may feel your relationships are one sided and will look for evidence of this everywhere you can

10) You have a fear of reaction

You cant love, you shut people out on purpose

You wont feel true emotion for fear they will leave and you will get hurt

The only person you can count on is yourself, and even then you know you are flawed so you dont actually trust anyone

You wont let anyone in, you know that if you do and truly let go then you could be overpowered with your thoughts and feelings

You have armour that you hold around your heart , you harden yourself to feelings

So where to from here…………

Id love you to watch my video on how to love yourself here

Or maybe even check out my 15 days to self care course here

Or consider reading my book, more details here